


The Things That No One Imagines

by ImagineThis



Category: The Imitation Game (2014)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, My First AO3 Post, My First Fanfic, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-16 02:40:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11244645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImagineThis/pseuds/ImagineThis
Summary: What if, when Alan was summoned to the headmaster's office, he was told that Christopher had not died?How does this change the course of events and their relationship?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own or claim rights to the story or characters in The Imitation Game.
> 
> If I did, it would be a lot less heartbreaking!
> 
>  
> 
> So this is my first fanfiction that I have ever written.  
> I have seen The Imitation Game multiple times but when watching it the other day , one thing stood out to me.
> 
> What if Christopher hadn't died? 
> 
> I mean we can all agree that their relationship in the film would most likely have progressed to something romantic.
> 
> They're just so sweet with each other! I hate what happened to him! 
> 
> So this is my fix it fic to give them the ending that they deserve!
> 
> Bear with my writing and please comment on what I can improve on, with some nice comments in general :)!

"Why am I here?" I asked the headmaster, confused as to why he was probing me on my friendship with Christopher, quite frankly it was not his or anyone else's business.

"Something's come up with Christopher." He replied

I waited for his reply and could sense he was delaying on replying but nevertheless I was anxious to hear what he had to say and get out of his office.

"Christopher is very sick." That first line made me freeze and cleared my mind of all thought.

Sick.

He couldn't be. We only parted two weeks ago, his last note to me confirmed that we would see each other again. In three days to be exact. But now? 

Will he be coming back? Is it serious? What illness does he have? Can I see him? As if someone had turned on the light, question upon question flooded back into my brain. Of course I would never voice these to the headmaster. I let him continue and just stared stoically back at him, not wanting to give any indication of how this had affected me.

"He won't be back with us until a few weeks into term. His mother let the school know, with a message from Christopher saying that we had to tell you this Alan." He stated, looking at me.

"I don't understand." I replied. I couldn't allow myself to say anymore. A hint of realization dawned on me.

Wait. He's alive? 

" Christopher is receiving treatment for bovine tuberculosis . He was keen on letting you know that he was well, and hadn't in fact died despite concerns over his health... As I'm sure he told you?"

Relief washed over me. But I didn't reply immediately. I did not know of course. He never looked ill when he was with me.

"No. He did not tell me sir"

" Oh… Well nothing to worry about. He'll be well in no time. You can go now Alan."

Nodding at the headmaster, I walked out of his office. When I let the door shut behind me, I leaned on it and exclaimed a sigh of relief.

That conversation could have gone differently. I could have been told that Christopher…  
No he was fine, just delayed in coming back to school. 

But why didn't he tell me he was ill?  
I was scanning through all of our previous conversations, trying to remember if he had told me something about it. I couldn't recall anything. 

A stab of anger hit me. Surely Christopher would have felt it important enough to tell me that his health was at risk? We were friends and friends told each other everything, their worries, their secrets. Well not in this case.

Sighing, I felt in my pocket and lifted the paper out. 

P ZQAE TQR

There it was, my secret to Christopher.

That conversation could have meant that he would never have heard it. But fate, if one could call it, I was still unsure if i believed in such a thing, had intervened.

Christopher would still be able to hear it. 

I wanted him to reciprocate my feelings, he's always been nice to me. Never said a bad word to me. But if he didn't, well… it would most likely break the only meaningful friendship that I'd had. Well, I thought, let's hope it won't come to that.

Walking back to my room, I couldn't help but anticipate his return, I couldn't be settled until I physically saw him, knew he was okay. What the headmaster said to me was of little comfort. 

I just have to wait a few more weeks before Christopher returned to me. My secret will just have to wait before it is told.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!   
> Enjoy :)

The sun streaming through the window woke me up, I got out of bed, put on some clothes and sat at my desk.

It was a weekend and I had finished all of my homework set by my teachers, so there wasn't much else to do.

Rummaging about, I found a crossword that I hadn't completed yet, so I started on it, seeing if I could beat my 15 minutes record to complete it.

Only a few minutes went by when a knock at my door broke my concentration. 

'Who could this be?' I thought, it better not be those boys again, who kidnapped me and placed my under the floorboards and left me there to rot.

I hesitantly went to the door and opened it.

" Just lea-" I started as I opened the door but I never finished that sentence.

"Hello Alan."

Christopher was stood there in his normal clothes, a smile on his face. He did look pale but otherwise he looked as we parted 4 weeks ago. 

"Christopher." I replied. Temporarily flumaxed, I paused. He is here and he is fine. 

"Wh…What are you doing here?"  
"To see you of course… my dearest friend"

I flushed at the comment, remembering the last message we exchanged, the smile I had when I cracked it. 

'Dearest friend' 

I had never been that to anyone.

Opening the door wider, Christopher walked in, over to my desk. 

I closed the door and turned, studying him. My mind full of questions for him.

'Are you better now'  
'Why did you not tell me you were ill'  
'What are you doing here'  
'Christopher I lov-'

No! I cannot tell him that. Not yet. 

"Still doing crosswords Alan. I had hoped in my absence, you would have embraced the language of ciphers and codes." Christopher said with a hint of humour in his voice. He still had his back to me. Obviously something on my desk was of immesne interest to him.

Sighing, I walked over to my bed and sat on it.

"Alan-"

"Why did you not tell me that you were ill?" I said before him, the most pressing question I needed to ask him.

He walked over to me and sat beside me, he seemed to consider his answer.

Another confusing part about people, when you ask them an important question, they never seem to answer you straightaway. Always pausing, trying to come up with an alternative that is never the answer that you seek.

" I…. I didn't want to worry you Alan. It is nothing that be you problem."

" I thought I was your friend. Don't friends tell each other what bothers them? You know about the people that bully me-"

" I thought they didn't bother you?" Christopher interrupted.

"They don't. But telling me that you're ill, would have been considerable of you. Friends should not have secrets."

Silence stretched between us. I looked down at my hands, fidgeting with them. Suddenly, he placed his hand on top of mine. I looked up at his face, he staring directly at me.

"I am sorry Alan. I should have told you and from now on, I'll tell you anything that bothers me."

I looked from his face, to our hands and back to his face again.

I couldn't look away from him. Christopher was holding my gaze. All that I could hear was our breathing. 

My mouth opened to formulate the words but before I could get them out, Christopher removed his hand off mine and stood up. 

"I need to unpack my things and settle in. I shall see you later Alan." Christopher said, turning around, walking towards my door.

Finally, my brain permitted my mouth to speak so I replied

"Yes, I'll see you later." 

I heard the door close, but I was looking back down towards my hands, I brought them up to my face. I could still feel the warmth from Christopher's.

I couldn't help but smile and kissed my hands, feeling my heart beat just a little bit faster. 

I walked over towards my window and looked out onto the grounds. Boys were walking together, talking about some meaningless rubbish no doubt, laughing and hitting each other and enjoying each others company. 

For a moment I imagined that me and Christopher were down there. Walking… hand in hand. Talking in our own secret language. Alas, we couldn't do that. Certainly not holding hands. Not if we wanted to get expelled from school.

Turning away from the window, I decided to go to the library, something there will help distract my mind.

What I failed to notice as I left my room was, if I were to look down at my desk and study it, I would have noticed that my note to Christopher containing my secret was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to the people who have left kudos and a MASSIVE thank you to Thesherlockholmes who gave me first comment :D!
> 
> Though they be but few, they give me the confidence and motivation to continue on with my first fanfic.
> 
> Here is another chapter, enjoy :)!

Sitting in the library was a pastime I enjoyed. I always sat in the same seat, a small desk in the corner next to the books about drama, containing hundreds of old plays. Naturally, in a boys boarding school, few of them are interested in reading The Tempest by William Shakespeare. So I could be assured that I would not be disturbed.

But I wasn't doing anything productive that would disturb my concentration. I was just writing words and converting them into code. I had remembered the key from my book so converting them was not difficult. Unlike Christopher's assumption, I had learned more about codes and ciphers in his absence, I was quite good at them, if I do say so myself. I found it difficult to concentrate though, my mind was just not in it.

Putting my pencil down, I slumped on the desk, putting my head in my arms. 

When is the best time to tell someone, something of great importance? I want to find Christopher right now and just come out with it, but I have this feeling that it may not be the right time, he has only just come back to school. Soon though, I ascertained, he will be told soon. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I didn't see Christopher for the rest of the day, not even at dinner. Laying awake in my bed, I stared at ceiling, finding it impossible to sleep. Tomorrow, will be a normal day, in lessons. 

That means I will be in constant company with Christopher. That will be a good thing, I enjoy his company. But I can't help but feel nervous. How can I expect to act normal around him? To fall back into our old routine? 

Oh this is silly! I shouldn't consume myself with these thoughts. They do no good, only worry me even further. I find worrying pointless, it serves no purpose. Nothing is solved and the problem will still be there whether you worry or not. Right, the thing to to would be to carry on as normal, nothing is out of the ordinary and a time will present itself to tell Christopher my secret. 

Turning onto my side, I looked over at the clock.

3:00. Only a few more hours before I have to get up. Might as well try to catch some more sleep before facing a day of learning and study… And inevitably Christopher.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sitting on a bench with over a hundred boys around you should make one feel as though you are always in constant company and can strike up a conversation at any time with one of them.

But I didn't feel like that, sitting there, continually stirring my porridge, waiting for the 9 o clock bell that would signify the first lesson of the day.

I never feel comfortable with striking up a conversation with one these boys. Whenever I have, they have either pretended not to have heard me; just call me names and make fun of me, or when we do actually speak, I can tell that they are looking for a way to get out of the conversation politely. 

So now I no longer try. It doesn't bother me really. I mean they just cannot appreciate a meaningful conversation when they have one. Only one person has been appreciative of my company.

I lifted my head up, looking around the room for said person. I spotted him at the end of the bench at the other side of the room. 

He was talking with someone, smiling and conversing as he usually does. I took this time to study him.

He looked at ease with the other persons company, he always does, I thought. He can just strike up a conversation with anyone. How can you just do it with such ease? Whenever I try I just feel awkward and it feels forced. I want to be with someone who genuinely appreciates my company.

As if he could sense me looking at him, Christopher looked over at me. 

I smiled at him and gestured towards the door so we could walk towards our first lesson, Latin, together. Maybe I could tell him that I needed to speak to him privately later. That would give me an excuse to be in his company, alone. Perhaps I could tell him then…

But he just shook his head, gave me a small smile and turned back towards the other person.

I couldn't move for a few moments. I was shocked. We always walk together. But he had just rejected me.

Standing up from the bench, I walked out of the room and towards my classrom, silently confused and angry. 

Why is he acting weirdly towards me all of sudden? 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I opened the door my room and shut it, a bit fiercely.

I was glad the day was over. Not the first day back I was expecting. The lessons were just the same, the teacher talks at you whilst you take notes and occasionally picks on you to answer a question.

But Christopher. I couldn't believe it. Not so much as a hello on my direction. And in Maths, he studiously ignored me, no passing notes this time.   
Well if he wants to behave like that, he can. I couldn't help but feel frustrated though. 

Why is he treating me like this? Have I done something to upset him? What happened to telling each other our worries? 

Putting my books on my desk, slamming them if I later recall, I pull the chair out and sit down, staring at my desk.

Paper, spare textbooks, books and pencils littered the surface. I decided to organize it, thinking that would help take my mind off things. 

As I got into the task, I remembered. 

The piece of paper. 

Now searching it throughly, I threw papers to the floor, opened and closed books.

Where is it? I did place it here, I remember. 

I stopped.

Maybe someone has taken it, I wondered. One of those boys who made it clear to show their dislike of me…. Fear began to flood me. 

No no no. If they did, they would discover my secret…  
As if on point, the more logical part of my brain stepped in.

They wouldn't discover your secret. All they would find is scrambled letters. They would not figure out it was a code. And let's face it they wouldn't, their intelligence is a testament to that.

Sighing, I continued my search but in a more calm manner, this time. I must just not be looking properly. 

It was as I was searching through papers, a voice behind me stated

"Are you looking for this Alan?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the extra kudos my fellow readers .
> 
> Here is your treat of the longest chapter I have ever written ( though realistically its not that long, but to me it's an achievement)
> 
> Enjoy :)

Are you looking for this Alan?"

At that moment, time seemed to have stopped. My brain had shut down and my body froze.

Putting down a book, I slowly turned towards the source of the voice, hoping that my suspicions would not be confirmed.

They were.

Standing in front of my door was Christopher and in his hand was…

The paper.

My attention was focused solely on it that I didn't notice Christopher coming towards me. It wasn't until he was in front of me that I did. I swallowed and looked up to him. He was staring directly at me, I could not look away. I felt as though that would break the connection that passed between us in that moment. 

But, my brain switched itself back on and I noticed our close proximity. I snatched the paper out of his hands and strode passed him, the words seemed to come tumbling out of my mouth, in a mixture of embarrassment and fear.

"You weren't supposed to have found that. Its… Its.. Its nothing really. It is just a scrap piece of paper. Nothing on there worth read-"

"Alan I love you too."

" As you see, its nothing. If I could just-"

I turned back towards him, the paper fell out of my hands and instant recognition flooded through me.

Did he just… No he did not… I must have misheard….

He stepped towards me and turned the paper over and brought it up to my face.

I read it and there was his reply.

Shock ran through me. This could not be happening.

Christopher lowered the paper and a small smile appeared on his face and he lowered it towards mine before whispering 

"I love you too."

He closed the distance between us and his lips met mine. It was only brief and it wasn't until he pulled away that I realized what he had done. 

My brain is making a regular occurrence of shutting down on me. That needs to be rectified, I thought waywardly before Christopher spoke again.

" Alan. How long have you kept this secret?"

I opened my mouth but no words would come out. I still couldn't believe that Christopher had just… Kissed me. Well, I was not expecting that.

His eyes were studying mine and I realized that he was waiting for a reply.

Stammeringly I said " ab abo.. About a month."

"A month?! Wait, so you have been keeping this from before we parted for the holidays? Before I was..." His voice petered off and I knew he was going to say 'before I was ill.' 

I nodded meakly and turned away from him to sit down on bed. I stared at my hands. I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

"Why didn't you tell me as soon as I returned to school?"

I sighed before hesitantly saying

" Because I felt reluctant too. I didn't think it was the right time to confess something like this. I still don't think it is the right time."

I noticed the bed dipping beside me, he placed his hands on top of mine 

" Well then, when would you have told me?"

I couldn't answer him. When would I have told him? Next week? In two weeks? In a few months? Years?  
I have kept saying to myself it is not the right time but when is ever the right time? Oh how frustrating this is! Well there's nothing to do now, my secret is out. 

" I don't know." I confessed. Honestly I did not know.

"Did you think I would not reciprocate?"

Again I did not answer and such a silence passed between us that I could feel my own rapid heartbeat.

A part of me did think that. I mean I hadn't picked up on any indication that Christopher did like me in any other sense than as a friend. But then again, I'm not very good at reading other people. I can't look at someone and tell what they are feeling. Or know what it is a person is really saying. 

I thought of the words to say.

" I wanted you to, it certainly has made this easier, but I put it off because if you did not reciprocate my feelings, then I would have destroyed our friendship. And I could not risk that."

I looked up, straight at him and continued, though the next words I said were very open and honest, that I felt uncomfortable uttering them but they needed to be said in order to be clear to him.

"You are my only friend Christopher-" He looked as though to interrupt but I stopped him.

"You are. I don't get along with anyone else as much as I do with you. They all think and tell me that I'm odd. But you have never done that. You are interested in what I have to say and never make nasty remarks or make fun of me."

Christopher continued to look at me and I felt self conscious under his gaze. 

What was he thinking? Had he heard what I said?  
He did look a bit distant.

"Alan… I…" He stopped and grabbed my hands with us and brought them up before our faces. 

"Alan. You are… Impossible." He smiled and kissed the my fingers before continuing, I felt my face heat up. 

"You are so extraordinary. You dont see things as others do, you don't act or speak the same way. You are completely yourself, no matter how awkward or blunt it maybe." He smiled at me.

" It is for that reason, along with others, that I love you. Didn't you notice that I sat closer to you than necessary or touched you when I didn't need to?"

I thought about this. 

We did sit close together under the tree that time but that was so we could both rest up against it. Oh, and he did touch my arm when saying good night to me but that was just a friendly parting gesture, 

Wasn't it? I felt bewildered.

"You did that to show your interest in me?"  
"Yes I did." He said exasperatedly.

As though a penny dropped, every interaction together suddenly made sense.

" Oh" was all I could say before Christopher dropped our hands, laughing but still not letting go. 

I dropped my eyes from his, feeling stupid. Though it is rare that I feel that. I am clever after all.

"Well I think now that we know we're on the same page. Where do we go from here Alan?" Christopher asked, rubbing his thumb over the top of my hand.

I made to reply but a thought struck me.

" If you did want show your interest in me, then why did you avoid me today? You didn't walk to class nor did you speak with me. You made me feel as though I did something wrong."

A brief pause ensued before Christopher replied

" I didn't mean to but I have known your secret since Saturday and I did not what to do, like you, I didn't want to confront you with this Alan. It was your secret to tell, not mine. I couldn't risk letting you know that I knew, so I decided to avoid you but I realize that was wrong and I'm sorry."

Taking in what he said, parts of it made sense but I couldn't fully understand it. I would have preferred him to tell me upfront, I can't be doing with people avoiding the truth…. Though I can't really judge.

" I accept your apology but Christopher-" I squeezed his hand so that he would know that I was serious and wanted to get the message across.

" I need to know what you are feeling. I cannot always figure it out."

He leaned towards me again, his lips hovering over mine.

" I will Alan. I promise."


End file.
